Weezy Wednesdays: Brown Shirt Beckons

She’ll do pretty much anything for Brown Shirt!

We are Avatars!

Hey guys Brakes here again.

A couple weeks ago due to beer pressure (I convinced her after she’d had a few) I got Gas to agree to see Avatar in 3-D. Now you’d have to be living under a pack-and-play to have not seen this movie, but this was not a given for us due to our sordid history with science fiction movies. The first and only one I’ve ever been able to drag Gas to see was the third Lord of the Rings movie to which we snuck into the theatre midway through on my birthday after I’d agreed to see a Hugh Grant chick-flick. What a deal! She was very uninterested until the epic battle scene where the dwarf demands the ranger toss him over the threshold so he can battle on the other side: “Toss me. I cannot make the jump!” She now exclaims this whenever she doesn't want to do something, be it washing dishes, or walking back to the car in the costco parking lot. It’s a line that never gets old. To her.

Although we do agree that Avatar was akin to Ferngully on steroids . We luckily have been able to avoid Post Avatar Depression (P.A.D. for short) although the other day I thought to myself how neat it would be if real life were in 3-D. We’ve been quoting the movie nonstop and we borrow phrases from the Na’vi language such as:

Na'vi: "I see you" Translation: I love you

Our house: I see you... literately. I see you ignoring the poopy diaper and waiting for me to notice.

Na'vi: "Unobtainium" Definition: A rare mineral valued at “20 million a kilo"

Our House: A synonym for sleep or something that is equally rare and absolutly just not going to happen. For example: "How much unobtainium did you get last night? Oh, not much. How about you?" "You want to unobtainium later?" "Not gonna happen, Brakes." It is a multifunctional word.

Na'vi: "Woodsprites" Definition: seeds of the "holy tree", appearing similar to airborne jellyfish.

Our House: A synonym for poop. Used in a sentence: "Weez made another woodsprite so soon?!... Honey, can you get this one?" "Sorry honey it’s unobtainium."

Our Avatar obsession also lead us to make an avatar of Weezy at this website: http://www.avatarizeyourself.com/. She can thank me later.

So without further ado we present our powerful little Na’vi warrior:

Weezy Wednesdays: Piggies and Kisses

This video is pretty much just a gratuitous homage to my darling girl’s gorgeous pig-tails.  Though it also showcases her new fancy kissing abilities!

Announcement!

Brakes here again. I’m not sure how long you typically wait to tell this kind of thing? We waited about 3 months to announce our first born but this time around we are way too excited!

We always thought we’d plan this in advance, but sometimes life just happens.  Gas and I got drunk one night and, well, you’ve heard this story before…

We started trying last week, but it was a bust, so Auntie Diana came to babysit the Weez on Saturday and, with the splendor of adult-only time, Gas and I decided to give it one more go-round.   Not to get too graphic but it took several locations, frustration, and disappointment before we finally landed in the sweet-spot; Best Buy.  We were about to give up but, at the last minute, we spied the perfect one!  It looked so lonely all by itself. Apparently, another family had purchased it, but it wasn’t a good fit so they had to bring her back. Their loss was our gain; Gas and I were in love at first site!  So we bought the little beauty and excitedly left, in a hurry to introduce her to the rest of the B&G household. On the way home, I couldn’t help but feel a little overwhelmed with the amount of responsibility our new family member would be, but we were sure it was the right choice.

The next day I spend nearly 4 hours with her making sure she felt welcome and comfortable in her new home. I can’t lie, she did tinkle a bit at first, but I think we’ve housebroken her now.

Gas and I are pleased to announce the newest member of our family:

The LG LDF6920ST Dishwasher.  Isn’t she pretty?  And yes, she will be expected to do some chores around the house.

Rainy Maladies

I woke up one day last week to a sound that leaves many a mom of newly mobile babies quaking in fear: thunder!  Like much of the west coast, the Bay Area has been inundated with storms and showers for the last two weeks.  We’ve had nary a day of sunshine and poor Weezy hasn’t been to the park in what seems like eons!  For a kiddo who likes to get out and about (and a mom who likes her kiddo to get out and about) the hassle of a rainy day makes us more than a bit blue.  It also makes us more than a bit bored. 

In my pre-baby life I would relish a rainy day and use it as an excuse to stay in my jammies, sipping spiked tea, and watching reality TV reading a good book, all day long.   But life with baby does not exactly lend itself to blissfully buzzed blasé afternoons, and besides it would be inappropriate to ignore the baby and drink read the day away, so I had to get creative.  By 11:00 AM we had banged pots and pans together.  Pulled at Tess’s ears.  Emptied and reloaded Daddy’s sock drawer.  Twice.  Sang silly songs in the shower.  And practiced crawling up and down the stairs.  I was exhausted and ready for a nap but Eloise seemed to be invigorated by the inclement weather and she adamantly refused to sleep.  By noon I was desperate enough to go digging around in the catacombs, combing through all of my old teaching materials, looking for an infant-appropriate diversion.  When my eyes alighted on the gross-motor tunnel, I knew I had struck gold! 

Eloise crawled, dragged, and peak-a-booed the afternoon away until finally her dad came home and mama got a cocktail break!  Before I passed out (from exhaustion, people!  What do you take me for!?) I managed to snap a few cute shots!

It is a good thing she is so freaking adorable because she sure is a handful!

 

Weezy Wednesdays: My Kids a Narcissist (Take II)

(Lets try this again, shall we?)

Mirror, mirror on the wall? Whose the fairest of them all?

Apparently, Weezy feels that she is; she’s been making-out with her image every chance she gets!

I Love My Hardwood.

Wow. There really isn’t a clean way of saying that is there? But it’s true. Hi everybody! Brakes here. While Gas is off steady chasin that paper, her majesty has allowed me to talk about our newest house update.

One thing we loved about our rental was the gorgeous, refinished hardwood floors. That wasn’t in the cards this time around, but we tried to see the bright side; now we’d inherited older, more experienced… even worldly… carpeted floors.   They weren’t sexy and sleek like in our rental but we tried to appreciate them just the way they were.  While Gas and I pined after our foxy hardwood of yore, Weez (much to Gas’s dismay) fostered a fast friendship with the wizened blue shag dressing the bedrooms.

We gave it our best shot but the carpets clearly weren’t the floors for of our dreams.  It wasn’t them, it was us… We’d arrived at a different stage in our lives; we’d made (and then spent, on this God-Forsaken money pit) our million (***figure greatly exaggerated for dramatic sake***).  We didn’t want to be tethered down by tired, worn carpeting… not when there are so many fruitful, young hardwood beauties out there just begging to be installed.  So after a couple of months I drove down a discreet back alley to the den of inequity that all renovators know about but never discuss in polite company; I ventured to Lumber Liquidators.  

I told myself that I just wanted to look.  But when I took a gander at such a flagrant display of flooring flesh, I felt my resolve slipping.  I knew this would be an expensive proposition and I suddenly felt guilty for hiding this trip from Gas. I was a bit nervous as I watched the salesman approach, not having done this before and all, but the host made me feel right at home. He assured me that all the hardwood is well taken care of and that people pay good money to spend time with them. So, when I was ready he gently lead me to the merchandise, enticingly lined up along the wall, and asked me to pick my pleasure.  Do I go with something adventurous like a dark bamboo? Or a tantalizing blonde variety? Perhaps an exotic hickory? Hmmm….Then there was the question of size? Thin or thick?  Was bigger really better? There was even a discount on the fake ones but they didn’t feel real to the touch, so I decided not to go that route.  Besides, I knew Gas would never accept a fake.  In the end I went with a solid wide-plank distressed oak. She wasn’t cheap and it only took maybe four minutes to make a commitment, but in the end, I knew she would be well worth the price. Now I just had to go home and tell Gas.

The days spent waiting for them to arrive seemed endless. After an appropriate 48 hours I broke down and called, but I only received a very coy voicemail. The next week, jilted, I called again.  Another two weeks passed, but still no call. I was beginning to contemplate moving on (there are plenty of other flooring options in the sea!), but just as I started to browse various other hardwood ads, the call came at last!  “Your hardwood will be delivered Tuesday,” they said. I immediately phoned our installers, and they assured us that while the transition(s) would be rough (no pun intended) that most couples quickly fall in love with their new floors.  “Tell me something I don’t know!  I’m already head-over-heels,” I sighed dreamily.

The installers weren’t kidding. There were definitely were some tough moments. Could I afford these floors? Would they mesh with our lifestyle? After all, if they can’t get along with my family then it won’t work…. Obviously Gas and the baby were my top priority.  But with relief, I soon discovered that there was one compatibility issue that wasn’t a problem. Gas loved them too (I have the coolest wife ever!) and she embraced them as if they were her idea!

After the first day I thought to myself these floors have everything. We prepared a toast that night to welcome our new floors into our home.  “May our relationship be modern enough to endure the times and old fashioned enough to last forever!” we sang as we carried ourselves over their threshold.

…We celebrated their arrival with a festive meal!

… And afterwards, we cozied up to them by the fireplace.

Then when the time was right… …….

The morning after (the installation) things were momentarily awkward… but then we introduced our floors to the Weez and her exuberant welcome broke any residual tension!

I know that, on these floors, we will all be one big happy family!