Sh*tbucket! It was that time again! Time for my darling girl's tender flesh to be pierced and pillaged by the savage point of an angry needle! Ugh. I was 3 weeks late for her 3 month vaccinations so we went on Monday. I buttered her up with playgroup first and then when she least expected it, I brought her upstairs to the injection room. Doom-da-doom-doom. Am I the only one who feels like I am bringing my kid to slaughter when shot time comes around? The only thing that made my guilt ridden mind feel better was seeing that they had the Eloise book (of course, we did not read it. Germs, you know.) for which Weezy was named after on the book shelf in the waiting room. This is not a super common book so seeing it, I deemed a good omen and I did not wimp out and run kicking and screaming back to the car.
When the nurse called her name, we bravely moved forward. I lay the Weez down on the table and the nurse prepared the needles. My eyes got huge when I saw how long the silver beast was and I querulously asked, "How does it not hit bone?" The nurse looked at me, then looked at Weezy's luscious thighs, then looked at me again and said, "Are you kidding?" Then she ruthlessly stabbed my baby deep into the muscle. I clutched the Weez to my chest and very imperiously said, "Just what are you implying?" Before she answered, she stabbed the other thigh. Both thighs! Agh! Then she looked at me and smirked, "Your kid's got thunder thighs."
Whhhhheeeeellll! I never! I gathered my delicate Weezy up and huffed out of the office, so caught up in this caustic exchange, that I did not even realize until later that my little lady never even shed a tear! She is such a brave girl! Maybe, knowing this, I will not put off her 4 months shots until they are almost a month late. Mmmm. I probably will.
Here Eloise is sleeping off the copious amount of Baby Tylenol my guilty conscience has jammed down her throat:
2 weeks ago