Monday, February 23, 2009

An Explanation...

I guess I forgot to explain the blog title in the last post. It is based on a simple theory that in every relationship there is a pusher and stopper, or as Henry likes to call them: the brakes and the gas.

Hello! Gas here; pleased to meet you. Surprisingly, given my profession, patience has never been my long suit. I seem to use up all my patience-points at work and as a consequence, I have nothing left over for really important life decisions like buying a house and having a baby. So, in reaction to this facet of my personality, I am always pushing for the next step whether we are ready for it or not.

In the early years of our relationship this manifested itself in me following Brakes (Henry) to Utah shortly after we met (this actually turned out quite well) and us adopting a second fifty-pound dog (Tess) when our first one (Darby) had yet to be potty-trained (this decision was less immediately successful).

Brakes is a classic over-analyzer and crazy-conservative when it comes to risk-taking. (I think this is because he was such a wild-hoodlum, unlike me who was a nice girl, during his adolescence.) Brakes has to examine each decision we make on a nuclear level. He asks and answers about 5,000 questions. He makes spreadsheets, does hours of research, and then most likely “sleeps,” on it for about a year and a half.

In the past this difference in our personalities has caused major points of contention. Now I have learned a few tricks to keep the level of angst down to a reasonable amount. I give Brakes PLENTY of time to get used to an idea. Awhile ago I sat Brakes down and we had a serious conversation regarding my biological clock. I made it clear that a year from then, I would be ready to start trying to get pregnant (TTC- Trying to Conceive). He had a year to make his peace with the idea. I had no interest in putting baby-making off for a year and then waiting for him to begin his exhaustive analyzation process. Thus he needed to begin plugging Baby BG (Brakes Gas) into his formula right away. After reassuring him that I was not giving him a (God-forbid!) ultimatum he began his calculations.

In the end my baby yearnings only festered for a few more months and we began playing with birth control fire in early 2008.

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